Thursday, November 20, 2008
Friends and Regrets
From left: Richard George, me, Ted Nasser, 1987, around the time we graduated from high school.
These were two of my three best friends at Chatham Township High School, along with Brett Bunker. There are many memories, most good and a few bad. Ted and I are still in touch and I would say we are still friends. He's one of those friends you can not talk to for months and months, and then when you do pick up the thread of friendship, it's like you never missed a beat. It's so easy with him.
Rich and I didn't talk for months and months at one point back in the day, although I can't really remember when or why. It was foreshadowing, I suppose, because Rich and I have not talked since about 1995. I last saw him when he stopped in Silver Spring, MD, on his way from New Orleans to New Jersey. He was doing the bohemian thing in New Orleans: putting out a street literary zine under the name "Science" while working at restaurants on the side to make ends meet. We'd had a crazy time together at Mardi Gras in 1994 (?), and then after the 1995 visit...again, not sure what happened. Right around the time I moved to Portland, he sent me a copy of his zine and the Zane Grey book "Taggart"...typical Rich. He's the one who introduced me to Jim Carroll, The Clash, Apocalypse Now, Richard Wright...he always had a counter-culture bent to him, even as he planned to go to law school.
I have occasionally tried to track him down, even going so far as to e-mail his old New Orleans roommate in the past few months. But nothing. I regret how things ended with us, even if I can't put my finger on the specifics of it. There's just a general unease about, like there was no closure. I miss him as a friend because he always challenged me in some way...he was just different enough and comfortable in that, while I have always felt conformist, to some degree. (A woman I work with blasted me for wearing khakis the other day..."you are better than that" she said, after a few martinis...but I'm not sure I am. I think maybe I am the khaki guy, but I've always cared so damn much about what other people think, that I can't always be sure what's me and what's me being what other would think is cool or acceptable).
Rich brought out good things in me. I hope he is well, and happy, and it would be nice to cross paths with him again someday.
These were two of my three best friends at Chatham Township High School, along with Brett Bunker. There are many memories, most good and a few bad. Ted and I are still in touch and I would say we are still friends. He's one of those friends you can not talk to for months and months, and then when you do pick up the thread of friendship, it's like you never missed a beat. It's so easy with him.
Rich and I didn't talk for months and months at one point back in the day, although I can't really remember when or why. It was foreshadowing, I suppose, because Rich and I have not talked since about 1995. I last saw him when he stopped in Silver Spring, MD, on his way from New Orleans to New Jersey. He was doing the bohemian thing in New Orleans: putting out a street literary zine under the name "Science" while working at restaurants on the side to make ends meet. We'd had a crazy time together at Mardi Gras in 1994 (?), and then after the 1995 visit...again, not sure what happened. Right around the time I moved to Portland, he sent me a copy of his zine and the Zane Grey book "Taggart"...typical Rich. He's the one who introduced me to Jim Carroll, The Clash, Apocalypse Now, Richard Wright...he always had a counter-culture bent to him, even as he planned to go to law school.
I have occasionally tried to track him down, even going so far as to e-mail his old New Orleans roommate in the past few months. But nothing. I regret how things ended with us, even if I can't put my finger on the specifics of it. There's just a general unease about, like there was no closure. I miss him as a friend because he always challenged me in some way...he was just different enough and comfortable in that, while I have always felt conformist, to some degree. (A woman I work with blasted me for wearing khakis the other day..."you are better than that" she said, after a few martinis...but I'm not sure I am. I think maybe I am the khaki guy, but I've always cared so damn much about what other people think, that I can't always be sure what's me and what's me being what other would think is cool or acceptable).
Rich brought out good things in me. I hope he is well, and happy, and it would be nice to cross paths with him again someday.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
#39
My 39th birthday has just about come and gone. It was a nice day, generally low key and not a huge deal made of the birthday, and that's fine. What's 39, besides the final step before the 40s arrive? There was the good news at the doctor's office...June 15 here we come...and that was exciting. And Lindsay made me a card at school, and sang to me in the shower this morning. What a sweetie. Nicola was loving and generous, as usual. So low key, yes, but I will definitely take many more birthdays like this: time with loved ones, hearing birthday wishes from friends and family.
More celebration tomorrow with Ella, and more cake! I better get to the gym in the morning.
More celebration tomorrow with Ella, and more cake! I better get to the gym in the morning.
